Evergreen

“Come on, skinny love, just last the year…”

I may not be happy with my life, but I'm satisfied with it. I do despise the people in it. Some are blessings; some are curses, and some I wish I had never met. You are one of the curses. A curse from the day I was born. You’re right. You have done nothing but fuck me up. I can lie and tell you that you have been there for me. But you haven’t. I am more of an older sister to that little girl than you ever were to me. From day one, you’ve made me feel worthless and at fault. I can have dreams, can’t I? So I want to go far away. It’s not to be away from them, stupid girl. It’s to get away from you.

“Told my love to wreck it all, cut all of the ropes and let me fall.”

Maybe you will never be anything of importance, maybe you hope to marry a rich man. I think you and I both know the chances of a handsome, kind, rich man ever wanting to marry you are slim to none. Partly because you don’t deserve it and partly because you are not a prize.

“Who will love you? Who will fight?”

I want you to know that I was the only person with a shred of faith in you. And you have diminished it to nothing. Crushing my dreams and hopes and making my laughter die away; making my smiles falter and stamping on my pride is about all you are good for. You have failed. Your evil has made me stronger. I may cry behind closed doors and wonder aloud, “What have I done?” but in the end, it was you. It was always you. I WILL make something of myself. I WILL have a life to be proud of. I WILL never contact you again. And if you need something, don’t bother asking. It won’t be given.