Envy

It's different with you. So that's why I can say that I don't think I have feelings for you like I did do for him. Because if I had heard about him what you told me, it would hurt. Very badly. And I would get furious and then sad and then listen to some sad music. But with you, I just became green with envy. Which makes me think that it's only lust with you. But that doesn't make sense either, because you're my best friend so...Maybe it's just selfishness and possessiveness. You're mine. Not hers. You should like me. It doesn't matter if nothing ever comes of it. But that's horrible. Am I a bad person? I care about both of you. I just don't know which one I want. Not like it matters anyway. Neither of you want me.